Wednesday, March 14

it's hard to be 2

we never really went through the "terrible/tantrum twos" with hiba. i mean, we thought we did. looking back, she was an angel. (ha - it's funny how time messes with memories). now, she definitely has a strong personality, which led to our fair share of fights, disagreements, struggles with her, but she is so verbal and just basically tried to reason with us most of the time. a lot of times (and still today), if we can get her to listen to what we say and give a reason for it, she agress. or comes back with a very reasonable (especially for a 3-year-old) counter-offer. and overall, she is a people-pleaser. she wants us to like her. she wants to hang out with us. she wants to be friends.

enter matthias. he is 2. he is not so much what i would call a "people-pleaser". he is a charmer. that is for sure. but he is also a "i'm gonna do things my way and you can live with it or leave me alone" kind of person. and if we think hiba has a strong personality - she's got nothin' on matthias (those darn second-born's. oops, that'd be my genes he's got....).

so i would say that we are in the midst of the "terrible twos". because really, many days his behavior is terrible. he is not terrible. he is still cute and funny and learning to grow up. but his behavior - oh. my. goodness.

for example, on tuesday morning, basically anytime i asked or even suggested that he do something, his response was to SCREAM "NOOOOOOO!", throw himself on the ground and/or run away from me. now the things were things like get his shoes so he can go outside, let me change his diaper, not dump sand all over the floor, let me wipe the snot rocket (or snot rocket ship, as hiba calls it) off his nose. in my opinion, all of those things actually benefit him and are not all that unreasonable. but that is obviously not his opinion.

and he is learning to talk (he says a lot of words, but i think he is still learning what they all mean), which also leads to a lot of frustration. if he has a request and can't think of the words, he just sits there and pants, fusses, and eventually screams. which is always a fun way to handle situations.

it must be hard to be 2. i think there is a reason that God made it so most people's earliest memories are a little later on in life. i mean, he can say words, but is still learning to actually use them. he is learning to do so many things - get dressed, brush teeth, eat, etc. - but can't quite do them by himself. he is learning that he can assert control, but there are boundaries that he is still figuring out.

but, if it hard being 2, i have to say - i think it's harder being a parent of a 2-year-old. it takes so much energy, consistency, love, attention, patience, energy, energy....things that don't come all that naturally to me. as matthias is growing, i am realizing how different he and hiba are. so everything that we did with hiba basically does not work with matthias. and things that we do with matthias do not work with her. so it takes a lot of on-the-job-learning, adjusting, and laughter.

i will say, that i love that he is getting older. even the screaming. because it means he is learning and growing and testing out this world, seeing how he fits into it. and that's a pretty fun thing to watch. even if it wears me out.

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