mr. matthias

i am confused as to why anyone coined the phrase "terrible twos". the twos weren't so bad, at least not for our kids. i mean sure, we had the whole separation anxiety, developing personality, getting into anything and everything phases, but all in all - not too bad.

(also, i tend to forget horrible chunks of life. sort of like child-raising p.t.s.d. so maybe it was bad and i don't remember. if that's the case, please don't remind me.)

now, with hiba, we obviously had some different issues going on. two was when we started to notice behaviors that were either increasing when they should have been decreasing or decreasing when they should have been increasing. and that all went on in the twos and threes, so it was hard to separate what was communication issues and what was the so-called terrible twos. but that was all different. i'm talking about the terrible twos that you hear about - tantrums, fussing, not sleeping, whining, always saying no, hitting, yadda, yadda, yadda.

the thing is, when your kids don't do those things at age two, you get to age three and think you are in the clear. you think, wow, i am pretty awesome. i sure know how to handle my kids and their development. my kids are so great. look at me and how great i am getting through that "terrible two" stage with flying color.

HA.

enter this guy:

don't let that innocent face fool you...

yeah. he will just blow that whole theory out of the water. this guy is tough these days. "opinionated" and "strong willed" don't really quite capture it. "independent" and "self-reliant" is putting it nicely. "pain in the butt" and "tiring" are not really the words that i would like to choose to describe him.

every. little. thing. is a fight. matthias, go put your shoes on. NOOOOOOOO!!!!! matthias, get your coat, please. *SCREAM!!!* matthias, eat this candy. I WANTED TO DO IT BY MYSELF!!!!!!! and holy cow, it is exhausting.

i have to keep reminding myself that one day this will pay off. one day, he will be a strong leader, sticking to his guns no matter what the cost. one day, he will fight for what he believes and stand up to anyone who says otherwise. one day, all of this "personality development" will be a positive thing.

but until "one day" comes, he will continue to try to wear me down with his fussing and whining and kicking and screaming and yelling and nay-saying.

well guess what, folks. joke's on him. because what he doesn't realize is that my parents had those "one day" thoughts about me as well. and too bad for matthias, that one day is here. and i'll outlast him. i'll keep on putting him in time out, keep on disciplining him, keep on refusing to listen to him scream, keep on making him apologize for his behavior, keep on making him use a big boy voice, keep on doing my darndest to channel his independence and strength into positive outlets without losing my mind. and i'll win. i have to. so that one day, by the grace of God, he'll win, too.